AI Crafting Breakups The Future Of Relationships

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"I don't care if it becomes the Terminator," I overheard at the deli counter. I wasn't eavesdropping, but the man was speaking loudly about AI. That wasn't what caught my attention.

He was a young, fit man, sharing stories of his dating life with his friend, the deli worker. He mentioned he was involved with "a few girls."

They laughed about his romantic escapades. Being out of the dating scene for a long time, I was curious. I knew younger generations used apps like Tinder, Hinge, and Bumble. But this man was talking about how he uses ChatGPT to initiate and manage these connections.

I placed my order, listening to what I dubbed "Love in the AI Age."

"I don't have words," he said. I silently agreed.

He then explained his use of ChatGPT to write texts for potential partners, and it seemed to be helping him secure dates.

The AI Romance Assistant

I had heard about this trend and wasn't entirely surprised. We're increasingly relying on AI chatbots like Gemini, Claude AI, Copilot, and particularly ChatGPT for various tasks. This includes job interviews, where ChatGPT might assist with responses in real-time, and even for emotional support. The natural conversational abilities of these Large Language Models (LLMs) have resonated with average consumers, who are adopting this advanced technology faster than usual.

More concerningly, some Gen Z individuals seem ready to bypass human dating altogether and consider marrying an AI. Thankfully, the man at the deli hadn't gone that far.

He didn't seem like a tech expert, partly because he often omitted articles from his sentences.

The ChatGPT Breakup Strategy

This dater, however, had found a unique ChatGPT application for relationships. Instead of ghosting women, he used ChatGPT as a "closer" to deliver the "letdown" text.

"I was dating this girl, and I want to send a breakup text," he told his friend.

He admitted that "words" were not his strong suit.

So, instead of ghosting or sending a confusing message, he prompts ChatGPT with his "feelings" and the "issues," presumably including the need to end things.

He particularly liked that ChatGPT could tailor the tone, asking if he wanted the text to be "warmer." He agreed and received what he considered the perfect breakup text.

"I send it and done!"

Is an AI Breakup Better Than Ghosting?

The deli worker behind the counter remained quiet. I couldn't tell if he was impressed by his friend's AI skills or worried.

"Thank god they don’t know me," the man chuckled, pleased with his cleverness. "I don’t use half of these words."

With his AI-assisted breakup method revealed, he took his sandwich and left. I looked at my cold cuts and thought about the state of modern relationships.

On one hand, there's some solace in knowing he didn't end things with silence. When I was dating in the 1980s, I once did something similar to ghosting by not calling a woman I had been seeing. I knew it was cowardly, but I couldn't find the words to tell her, either on the phone or in person, that I wasn't interested anymore (I suspect she felt the same). Weeks later, she called and yelled at me.

Perhaps this AI approach is better. Ghosting creates a void that can be filled with a mix of resignation, understanding, anger, and confusion.

This man, though arguably lazy and as cowardly as I once was, at least used a tool to turn his muddled thoughts into something coherent.

The Authenticity of AI Penned Emotions

Maybe the woman on the receiving end felt some sense of closure. But I wonder what would happen if they met again. If she mentioned the "considerate" breakup text, would he even recall what "he" (or rather, ChatGPT) had written? He didn't write it himself.

When I write something, I remember it. But this man simply copied and pasted ChatGPT's suggestion. He might just stare blankly and mumble, "Uh, yeah. Sure thing." So much for gallantry.

The "A" in AI stands for "artificial." It describes the nature of algorithmic intelligence. But when AI is used this way, it could also refer to the artificiality of the emotions conveyed. Even if this man "didn't have words," his own words, however imperfect, would have been his. That should count for something.

Ultimately, I hope the woman he broke up with wasn't too upset. She probably dodged an arrow (a metaphorical one, of course).

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• Would you marry an AI? A recent survey says most Gen Z-ers would - here's why that's a ridiculous idea

A 38-year industry veteran and award-winning journalist, Lance has covered technology since PCs were the size of suitcases and “on line” meant “waiting.” He’s a former Lifewire Editor-in-Chief, Mashable Editor-in-Chief, and, before that, Editor in Chief of PCMag.com and Senior Vice President of Content for Ziff Davis, Inc. He also wrote a popular, weekly tech column for Medium called The Upgrade.

Lance Ulanoff makes frequent appearances on national, international, and local news programs including Live with Kelly and Mark, the Today Show, Good Morning America, CNBC, CNN, and the BBC.